10 million monkeys
Jul 3, 08:11 PM by Darryl Crum
I read once a bit of pointless information that said something to the effect that if you give each of 10 million monkeys a typewriter, eventually one of them will bang out “War and Peace.” (On a sidebar, that would be socialism wouldn’t it: 10 million monkeys each with his or her own typewriter. We are a capitalist society so we would prefer to give 10 million monkeys one typewriter and see which of those 10 million monkeys will end up with sole possession of that typewriter. ) I probably got the number of monkeys wrong and I am sure it was not War and Peace, but the point remains the same.
Speaking of points, now is a good time to get back to my original one, which is that blogging is like giving typewriters to 10 million monkeys in the hope that one of them will eventually type out a yet-to-be published masterpiece. I think there is a better chance of me eating a pack of crayons and creating a Mona Lisa on Charmin.
As if to prove there is a major flaw in cosmic logic, I now have my own blog, and for now, blogging is my obsession – another something that will never get finished – never come to fruition. And when I die, I am sure my tombstone will rightfully read, “Life to Death, the only project this man ever finished.”
What a journey – all the way from mules and logs to computers and blogs. (There is some odd Zen to that idea, a similarity that perhaps only I can see.) And Zen or not, I think it is fair to say that giving me a blog is an insult to the whole concept of freedom of the press. Now instead of my wife’s family having to hear me belt out endless oracles on everything from “Onions make me fart.” to “George Bush gives me gas!”, I get to post my opinions here.
Will I be that one-in-ten million monkey that bangs out a masterpiece? I doubt it. The odds are probably better that I will win the mega lottery and have enough money to pay someone to have opinions for me. George Bush does that. He pays someone to have opinions for him. He calls the guy his speech writer. And yes, it might be fair to conclude that it is Dubya’s speech writer who gives me gas and not the chimpansy himself.
Anyway, when I decided to publish a blog as part of my website, I did a Google search for that ever famous quote by A.J. Liebling, “Freedom of the press is guaranteed only to those who own one.” I got so many hits, and not to my surprise, a lot of them were for bloggers who seem to think this specific quote justifies the results of their key banging.
Here is a qoute by Ed Howe who said, “No man would listen to you talk if he didn’t know it was his turn next.” Look around on this page and you will see a “Comments” link. Consider that your turn. Or, you could start your own blog. Let me help you get started…. “Well, Prince, so Genoa and Lucca are now just family estates of the Buonapartes. But I warn you, if you don’t tell me that this means war, if you still try to defend the infamies and horrors perpetrated by that Antichrist – I really believe he is Antichrist (see they had their own Dick Cheney and Karl Rove)-I will have nothing more to do with you and you are no longer my friend, no longer my ‘faithful slave,’ as you call yourself! But how do you do? I see I have frightened you – sit down and tell me all the news.”*
*Opening paragraph of War and Peace by Leo Tolstoy.
Hi Darryl, A fascinating read! Keep at it; either you will be the 10 millionth monkey OR ýou’ll win the mega lottery….....all you need is enough time. One thing is for sure, your wife is probably happy that you’ve become a blogger !!!! She’ll be even happier if you hit the jackpot.
— colin you know the rest Jul 15, 04:10 AM #